10. The back door was opened with a laminated library card.
9. The only things missing are your birth certificate and a box of No. 2 pencils.
8. Twenty-three calls to Salt Lake City show up on your phone bill.
7. That morning's obituaries are all taped to the refrigerator.
6. All of your answering-machine messages have been transcribed and typed.
5. Your bathtub smells of cemetery dirt.
4. Your diary entries are being posted to a RootsWeb message board.
3. Your grocery list has been rewritten in "Register style."
2. The black ski-mask found under your bed is marked "Property of Cyndi Howells."
1. Your browser's homepage has been changed to The Genealogue.
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