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Sunday, January 01, 2006

A 2006 Research Plan

January
Recover from your eggnog-fogginess and send thank-you notes to your relatives for their gifts. While you're at it, demand the names, birth dates, and Social Security numbers of their in-laws.

February
Make snow angels on the graves of your ancestors.

March
Celebrate St. Patrick's Day by drinking a toast to each of your Irish forebears. Stop at fifty if your name is "Colin Farrell."

April
Sign up for a 14-day trial at Ancestry.com. When you call to cancel, ask them to immediately sign you up for another 14-day trial.

May
Surprise your family on Mother's Day by not showing up drunk.

June
Attend the NGS Conference in Chicago. While there, attend a taping of The Oprah Winfrey Show and pretend you've read her latest Book Club selection. Maybe she'll give you a new car!

July
Spend your vacation looking for an ancestor's homestead in central Kansas. Don't ruin the experience by looking at a map.

August
Prepare your kids for the coming school year by having them transcribe 18th-century baptism registers.

September
Attend the family reunion only if they'll let you perform Wind Beneath My Wings with maracas.

October
Celebrate Family History Month by skipping work.

November
Spend the month looking for a new job.

December
Pick a Christmas tree that suits your family: large in girth and always needing a drink.

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