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Thursday, March 09, 2006

Top Ten Signs Your Ancestors Were Irish

10. Your mother wrote a cookbook called Angela's Hashes.

9. Upon arriving in the U.S., your great-grandfather drove all the snakes from Ellis Island.

8. You understand every word Colin Farrell says.

7. Your senior thesis was titled "They're Always After Me: Lucky Charms Deconstructed."

6. You're quite certain that James Joyce's Ulysses is the greatest book you've ever not read.

5. You once were jailed for asking a Dublin cop to try out his Gaelic on you.

4. You live in a compound at Hyannisport.

3. According to your grandmother, time was invented by a Killarney man by the name of "O'Clock."

2. Every time your family runs out of French fries, they move to another country.

1. Your urine turns green every March 17th.

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