Genealogical research can be really, really hard, but I've found a way to make it easy and fun. The trick is to create your relatives from scratch.
- Give him a name — To avoid suspicion, don't use silly made-up names like "Kiefer" or "Barack."
- Grab a picture of somebody else and make it look old — "Hey, my great-grandfather looked like Jack Nicholson!"
- Borrow some good anecdotes — "Remember the time he shared a hot tub with Kissinger?"
- Write fake news items about him — A couple of wedding announcements, an article on his DUI arrest and an obituary will put flesh on his artificial bones.
- Give him a proper burial — You don't want this guy showing up at reunions, so make sure he's good and dead!