Questioning Methods Questioned

A Genealogue Exclusive [What's That?]

Ellis Hanscom, president of the American Genealogical Association, insists that members of his organization "do not torture."

A memo leaked to The Washington Post last week revealed that AGA guidelines permit "enhanced interrogation techniques" when questioning relatives. Allegations of inappropriate interviewing methods have since come to light. An elderly man in Miami was placed in a "stress position" by an AGA member and deprived of sleep for two days because the name of his father's first wife had slipped his mind. A Connecticut woman who refused to give her date of birth was forced to listen to Britney Spears' latest single for seventeen hours straight.

"We do not torture," repeats Hanscom. When asked for his definition of "torture," he replies, "Whatever it is that we don't do."

Critic Harold Lord says that AGA's guidelines violate standards accepted by every reputable genealogical organization, and that information gained through such methods is unreliable.

"People will say anything to end a family history interview, we all know that. Why make it more unpleasant than it already is?"

Hanscom counters by saying that he has used the "enhanced" techniques on his own grandmother with great success.

"She told me things I'd never heard before. Who'd have guessed that Grandpa Ted invented Velcro and frozen yogurt while climbing Everest on horseback?"

[Photo credit: Inside the Torture Chamber by Ricardo Shuck]

Genealogy Company Hopes to Be Second to One

A Genealogue Exclusive [What's That?]

When World Vital Records launched in 2006, the founders had a modest goal: to become "the number two player in the genealogy industry." A year later, they are well on their way to meeting that goal.

"We're committed to being the number two genealogy company on the web," says Deputy Corporate Communications Director Britney Hanson. "That means that our customer service has to be absolutely second rate."

WVR guarantees that level of service by routing customer calls through India, Malaysia, Botswana, then back to India, where they're answered by homeless people loitering near pay phones.

The WVR philosophy extends to web development as well.

"Our webmaster was second in his class at the second-best IT school in Haiti," Hanson boasts. "His only prior experience was creating a MySpace page, but we think he's designed a great website for us—remarkable, really, given that he's completely color blind and types with his elbows."

In the online genealogy world, content is king. That's why WVR has searched the globe for the second-best content it can find.

"Right now we're digitizing the Godfrey Library's Discarded Family Group Sheet Collection. After that, we'll be scanning and indexing old 'Dear Abby' columns, grocery lists, report cards—anything we find stuck to our refrigerators at home."

And bigger things are yet to come.

"Yes, the rumors are true," Hanson reveals. "We are working with the National Archives to digitize the records of their employee softball league. The negotiations were tense, but being Number Two requires us to stay one step ahead of everyone else. Except Ancestry.com."

Company Offers Solution to High Copying Fees

A Genealogue Exclusive [What's That?]

The announcement that the National Archives intends to significantly raise its copying fees is bad news for genealogists, but great news for one Washington, D. C., entrepreneur.

Sandy Berger is best known as Bill Clinton's National Security Advisor, but he considers his new job just as vital. As founder and president of DocuDirect, Berger says he can deliver documents at half the price of other companies.

"At DocuDirect we cut out the middleman, saving you both time and money," he explains. "I know the Archives, and it knows me. In fact, some of the security guards even carry around my picture."

Familiarity with the Archives is just one part of the "DocuDirect advantage," Berger says. The former presidential advisor personally handles each request, wearing white gloves to avoid leaving fingerprints and clothing with extra-large pockets. Unlike other researchers who provide their clients with copies that are sometimes illegible, Berger delivers the original records.

"You'll receive your ancestor's actual Civil War pension record," he promises. "No matter how big the file is, you'll get every page—even if I have to stuff them in my socks."

Already fielding more requests than his small office can handle, Berger is planning to expand capacity once the fee hikes are implemented.

"I'm on the South Beach Diet," he confides. "I should be able to fit a half-dozen pension files in my pants come August."

More Passenger Lists Coming Online

A Genealogue Exclusive [What's That?]

NASA will announce on Monday an exclusive partnership with Ancestry.com to digitize and place online all the passenger lists created by the agency since its creation in 1958.

"This is exciting news for genealogists," says NASA Administrator Michael Griffin. "These passenger manifests will let them see their ancestors in a whole new light."

As an example, he pulls from a folder a record dated July 1969.

"We found this in a desk drawer just recently. It's kind of hard to read, but we believe the name at the top is Armstrong. Who knows, this person might still have family members living. This record will help pull their relative out of the shadows of history. If you'll notice, even his height was written down!"

Other details include age, hair color, and Tang consumption during flight.

Ancestry.com, according to a spokesman, is equally excited about the partnership, which will allow the company to add "literally dozens" of names to its index.

This news comes on the heels of an announcement in January that WorldVitalRecords.com has reached a similar deal with Mexico's space agency.

Genealogists Go Back to Basics

A Genealogue Exclusive [What's That?]

A small but growing number of family historians are parking their hard drives and doing genealogy the old-fashioned way.

"All this technology just makes it easier for errors to propagate," says Cindy Lewin, founder of a support group called Retro Roots. "By avoiding the Internet, we can be confident that our mistakes will be shared only with close relatives."

Cindy and her group refuse to use genealogy programs like Family Tree Maker to record their data. Instead, they store their facts in stacks of notebooks and reams of typewritten family group sheets. The Retro Roots gang also prefers microfilmed to digitized documents—a preference that large genealogy outfits like Ancestry.com are starting to acknowledge.

"We understand that different people have different tastes," says Andrew Mueller, spokesman for Ancestry.com's parent company The Generations Network. "That's why we're working to convert hundreds of thousands of digitized documents back to microfilm. We'll also be offering an offline version of our popular message boards. They'll be located in Provo, Utah, and thumbtacks will be provided free of charge."

Even the extreme position taken by Retro Roots is not extreme enough for some Luddites in the genealogical world. George Donnelly of Calumet, Wisconsin, doesn't trust microfilm, but relies solely on documents that he has personally inspected. He corresponds solely by registered letter. And don't get him started on Soundex.

"Soundex was the beginning of the end," he forcefully opines. "Making things easier for the general public is never a good idea. You give them Soundex, and pretty soon they're asking for the Pill and no-fault divorce. Where does it end?"

[Photo Credit: Cracked Laptop]

How the Pilgrims Lived

A Genealogue Exclusive [What's That?]

A book released this week explores the world of the Pilgrims in fascinating detail. In How the Pilgrims Lived, author Eric Fulham provides photographs and descriptions of household items that "came over on the Mayflower."

"I was worried at first that not many Mayflower relics had survived," Fulham admits. "But my research turned up thousands—from kitchen utensils to complete bedroom sets."

The section of the book devoted to Pilgrim furniture includes photos of 12 kitchen tables, 21 bureaus, and 73 rocking chairs, all of which were handed down in families claiming descent from Mayflower passengers.

"It's amazing that they were able to fit so much stuff onto that small ship," says Fulham. "No wonder it was so crowded!"

According to Fulham's research, objects that survived the 1620 crossing will appear on no less than 274 dinner tables this Thanksgiving. Myrtle Spaulding of Missouri will be using Mary Allerton's gravy boat, while the Jaques family of Florida will be seasoning their mashed potatoes with John Alden's salt shaker and Priscilla Mullins' pepper mill.

Fulham says that the items featured in the book were carefully selected from thousands presented by hopeful Pilgrim heirs.

"Sadly, some could not be included for lack of space. William Brewster's DVD collection alone would have taken up three pages."

[Photo credit: Kochen by Martina Oefelein (license)]

Political Debate Gets Genealogical

A Genealogue Exclusive [What's That?]

A heated debate was held Friday evening in Ypsilanti, Michigan, between incumbent Republican Congressman Paul Engstrom and Democratic challenger Harold Kimball. Tempers flared when Kimball accused Engstrom of failing to disclose his great-grandfather's ties to the Warren G. Harding and Herbert Hoover administrations.

"I have in my pocket the obituary of the man, which states that he was a lifelong Republican," said Kimball. "Is my opponent prepared to denounce his great-grandfather for voting in favor of corruption and economic depression?"

Engstrom refused to respond, but countered that Kimball had "a long family history of failing to support our troops."

"It's a matter of public record," the six-term congressman said, "that Harold Kimball's ancestors opposed the Civil War. They opposed the Spanish-American War. They even opposed World War II, and that was the best one we ever had. Being Quakers is no excuse for that kind of un-American behavior."

Accusations of infidelity and illegitimacy in the candidates' respective families followed. In response to a question from the audience, Engstrom produced two sets of DNA test results to demonstrate how little he has in common with President Bush.

The debate reached a head when Kimball accused the congressman of damaging books at the local Family History Center by folding over the corners of pages. Engstrom answered that he had never bent over pages and that, if he had, it was only because of his drinking problem.

'One Step' Author Steps Away From Project

A Genealogue Exclusive [What's That?]

Stephen P. Morse, genealogist and author of the popular One-Step Webpages, has reportedly scrapped his latest "one-step" search form.

The form, titled "Searching Your Relatives' Bank Records in One Step," would have revolutionized genealogical research by allowing easy access to a resource beyond the reach of most family historians. Morse is quoted as saying that writing the underlying script was "surprisingly easy," but that he worried it might fall into the wrong hands if placed on a publicly accessible website.

When contacted by The Genealogue, a spokesman for the U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission applauded Morse's decision to withdraw the form, adding that "accessing that kind of information should take at least two steps."

[Photo credit: ATM keypad 3/4 by redspotted (license)]

Genealogy Sparks Religious Revival

A Genealogue Exclusive [What's That?]

Attendance at the Brookhaven Trinity Church in rural Vermont hit an all-time low last spring, with only ten congregants showing up on Palm Sunday. But these days the pews are packed, thanks to the clever marketing strategy of Pastor David Lombard.

"I got to thinking, 'What will bring people back to the church? What are the services lacking?' Then I read how hugely popular genealogy is. That's when I had my brainstorm."

Since May, the pastor's sermons have been full of genealogy—so much genealogy, in fact, that he rarely has time for anything else.

"We've cut out the benediction and the hymns so we can have more time for the 'begats,'" Lombard says. "People love the 'begats'!"

This was evident on a recent Sunday when Lombard reprised his personal favorite: Genesis, Chapter 11. As he read from the Biblical genealogy—"And Abram and Nahor took them wives: the name of Abram's wife was Sarai; and the name of Nahor's wife, Milcah, the daughter of Haran, the father of Milcah, and the father of Iscah"—parishioners scribbled on the family group sheets tucked into their disused hymnals.

Critics say that Pastor Lombard is indulging "hobbyists," and overemphasizing one part of the Bible to the detriment of others that are far more important. But Lombard says he is sure of the path he has chosen.

"It's obvious to me that God wants this 'hobby' discussed in church. That's why the Bible says so much about genealogy, and nothing about collecting stamps."

Couple Fights for Custody of GenWeb Site

A Genealogue Exclusive [What's That?]

Two years after Roger and Jen Morey were married, they decided to adopt a county as part of the Illinois GenWeb Project. Now the couple is engaged in a bitter dispute over who will retain custody of the Wallace County genealogy website once their divorce is finalized.

"The adoption was all my idea," insists Jen. "I quit my job as a manicurist so I could spend more time with the site. Just look how much it's grown since then!"

Roger, she says, was excited about the adoption at first, but quickly lost interest when he realized how much work was involved.

"He doesn't care about the site. Sure," she says, "sometimes he'll play with it on the weekends. But when he comes home from work he never wants to hear about what's happened with it during the day."

For his part, Roger says his soon-to-be-ex-wife is unfit to look after their website.

"Once I came home and found she'd gone out shopping and left the site unattended. There were three queries waiting to be posted, and the dead links hadn't been weeded out in months. I'd rather permanently delete it than hand it over to a woman that irresponsible."

The issue will be resolved by State Coordinator Daniel Burns early next week. He would not comment on the specifics of the case, but did say that in such matters the "best interests of the project figure largely." Whatever his decision, the Moreys have both pledged to maintain their links to the website.

[Photo sources: Lianne Still Looking Unhappy and Unhappy Keith (license)]

Annie Moore Found Living in Iowa

A Genealogue Exclusive [What's That?]

Annie Moore has been the object of a frantic search since genealogist Megan Smolenyak Smolenyak announced a $1,000 reward for information on her fate. Now comes news that Annie—the first immigrant to pass through Ellis Island—is alive and well, a resident of the Cedar Rapids Home for the Aged.

Mrs. Annie (Moore) Donnelly is in remarkably good health for a 129-year-old woman, and is the reigning arm-wrestling champion at the home. She spoke to The Genealogue on Wednesday morning.

"Yes, I was the first at Ellis Island," she confirms. "I heard they were giving away a $10 gold coin to the first person off the ship, so I ran to grab it. Might've pushed down a couple of old folks. My brothers were fast runners, so I kicked 'em in the shins."

Mrs. Donnelly was surprised to learn that genealogists were looking for her, but not surprised that they could find no trace of her.

"Never trusted the government," she says. "Me and my husband never got a marriage license, never had any births certified. Census takers would come once in a while, but we'd beat 'em off the porch with a stick of wood."

Now that she has been found, Mrs. Donnelly is anxious to regain her anonymity.

"I don't care to have visitors. You tell that Smolenyak woman to send me my thousand dollars, and then leave me the hell alone!"

[Photo credit: Joan by Jon Eben Field (license)]

Vacations for Genealogists Getting Cheaper

A Genealogue Exclusive [What's That?]

Family Routes, a travel agency catering to family historians, is offering deep discounts on some vacation packages this summer.

"There's no better time to go to the Old Country," says proprietor Lance Cutler. "Depending on where your ancestors hailed from, you might be able to save as much as 40% on your hotel and meals—but if only you act soon."

The best deals Cutler offers are on Middle Eastern tours, like the "Lebanese Lineage" package.

"I wish I had ancestors from Lebanon so I could take advantage of this deal," he says. "We can set you up in the finest hotel in Tyre for under a hundred bucks a night. They're just begging for people to come. Really, I just saw them begging on CNN."

Family Routes still offers its popular "Back to Baghdad" package, which features a late-night flight into the city, armed escorts to sites of genealogical interest, and at least two hours of electrical service each day.

Cutler assures potential clients that travel to the Middle East is perfectly safe, and warns them not to believe what they read in the newspapers.

"You only ever hear about the bombs that went off—never about the bombs that didn't go off. And, despite what you might have heard, President Bush did not call for these countries to wage war on tourists."

[Photo credit: Takeoff by Joshua Davis (license)]

Genealogist Forgets Wife's Birthday

A Genealogue Exclusive [What's That?]

Gary Hurlburt shocked the genealogical community of Palo Alto, California, on Thursday by forgetting the birthday of his wife of 29 years.

Hurlburt is renowned in local family-history circles for his skill at remembering dates. Without a moment's preparation he can tell you when his great-grandfather Waldo Jepson was born, married, quit drinking, and died. Or which days of the week his ancestor Drusilla Withey's 23 children and their 38 spouses were born. But somehow his wife Linda's date of birth slipped his mind.

"It's embarrassing," he admits sheepishly. "I mean, she was born on the same day that Uncle Harley had his wisdom teeth pulled in 1956. How could I forget that?"

As for Linda, she's not quite ready to forgive the oversight.

"I know that family history is important to Gary, but this time he's gone too far," she says, her voice trembling with anger. "Forgetting to buy me a present was bad enough. But asking me to bake a cake for the anniversary of his uncle's tooth-pulling was just insulting."

[Photo source: Cake! by Phil Moore (license)]

Massachusetts Prepares for Invaders

A Genealogue Exclusive [What's That?]

Massachusetts is bracing for an invasion late this summer. The "undesirables" are expected to arrive the last week of August, but Flatland Security chief Arnold Nesbit says there is no need for residents to panic.

"Not yet, at least."

As soon as the FGS/NEHGS conference in Boston was announced, the Commonwealth began devising measures to protect its history from the prying eyes of genealogists.

"Every cemetery in Massachusetts will be locked down," says Nesbit, gesturing toward a color-coded map of burial grounds. "We've set up hotlines in every town, city, and county office, and have authorized the use of deadly force. Anyone asking to see a marriage certificate better have the proper ID."

At the forefront of the Commonwealth's plan is a bill now before the legislature that would seal off vital records from public view for decades. A related bill would ban the celebration of birthdays in public places.

"Think about it," Nesbit urges. "A kid has a party at Chuck E. Cheese. Now, everybody in the place knows when her birthday is and how old she is. We can't risk having a genealogist stumble onto that kind of information."

As the government ramps up security, Nesbit cautions citizens not to overreact.

"We've had reports of vigilante activity. An innocent title searcher was mistaken for a genealogist and manhandled at the Springfield Registry of Deeds. And some guy was caught trying to chisel the date '1620' off of Plymouth Rock. We want to make two things clear: If you think you've sighted a genealogist, report it to the proper authorities. And remember, we don't want to destroy our history—we just want to hide it where no one can find it."

[Photo Source: Massachusetts State Line by Chris Patriarca (license)]
[tagged: genealogy, family tree, ancestry]

Famous Genes In Demand

A Genealogue Exclusive [What's That?]

"We're nobodies," reveals Frank, an auto mechanic in suburban Atlanta. "They couldn't find Genghis Khan or Daniel Boone or anybody cool. Just some guy who sat on the House of Burgesses in the 1700s. Big deal."

They were doubly disappointed because they were planning to start a family, and wanted to pass on illustrious genes to their children.

"We'd want our kids to be interested in their roots," says Nancy, a Sunday-school teacher. "But you know kids today. It's all about celebrities."

The couple was considering adoption when Nancy spotted an advertisement in the back of People for CelebriDNA—a Los Angeles company that is capitalizing on the growing demand for famous genes.

"I'm not a scientist," founder and CEO Alberto Fuentes tells The Genealogue. "I'm just a guy who makes dreams come true. Who wouldn't want to share genes with a famous actor or a rock star? It's too late for the parents, but the kids not born yet—they've still got a chance."

For a fee, CelebriDNA will match a couple with a celebrity willing to contribute genetic material. The company's catalog of donors is a "Who's Who" of Washington, Hollywood, and the sports world, with at least one ex-President, three Oscar winners, and one Heisman Trophy winner with a penchant for Bruno Magli shoes on board.

"Yeah, O. J.," Fuentes smiles. "No one's picked him yet. Too bad, 'cause he could really use the money."

The most elite figures fetch a staggering price, so the Hammonds—whose budget is tight—have set their sights lower.

"We were thinking about a Senator," explains Nancy, "but we finally settled on Pauly Shore. In fact, he's coming tonight, so I'd better get dressed and light some candles."

[Photo Credit: Michell Zappa (license)]
[tagged: genealogy, family tree, ancestry]

Congress Considering Marriage Ban

A Genealogue Exclusive [What's That?]

Today in Washington, conservatives in Congress continued their push to ban same-Soundex marriage.

"It just confuses the children," explained Nebraska Democratic Senator Ben Nelson, who is running for re-election this year. "And Lord knows the children in my state are confused enough, what with the hippity-hop music and all."

Same-Soundex marriage is legal in twelve states, with seven others considering legalization. The problem arises when a couple married in one state moves to another which bans the practice.

"We had a case where a feller named 'Strader' went off to Vermont with a woman named 'Streeter' and got married," Nelson said. "Now you just know their kids are going to ask someday, 'Why were my parents born with the same Soundex code?' I think I'd be too embarrassed to explain it to them."

Opponents of the proposed ban charge that Nelson and his Republican allies are just being "homophonophobic."

"Having similar-sounding surnames doesn't mean two people can't fall in love and raise a family together," responds Patricia England-Engelman, founder of Same-Soundex Americans for Marriage Equality. "It just means that their kids might be born with webbed toes."

Senator Nelson isn't buying it.

"Marriage should be between a man and a woman with different-sounding names. I'm just following what the Bible says. The first two people were named 'Adam' and 'Eve'—not 'Adam Martin' and 'Eve Morton.'

[tagged: genealogy, family tree, ancestry]

Family's Name Changed at Ellis Island

A Genealogue Exclusive [What's That?]

Polish immigrants Aleksy and Brygida Charzewski were dismayed to find their name changed to "Chesley" at Ellis Island.

"I had heard of this sort of thing happening," says Aleksy, "but I never imagined it would happen to us."

The Charzewskis were visiting the Ellis Island National Monument on Monday with their daughter when the park ranger leading their tour began calling them by the wrong name. Residents of America for just two years, they felt too intimidated by the ranger's uniform to correct him.

"The man asked for our name at the beginning of the tour," Brygida explains. "My husband was ill from the ferry ride, so perhaps he did not pronounce it clearly enough."

Park Ranger Mark Collins insists that "Chesley" was the name told to him and that, besides, personnel at Ellis Island are not allowed to change anyone's name.

"Our job is just to move people through the place and weed out the troublemakers—that's it." Collins grudgingly accepts some of the blame. "It's my mistake I didn't send them back the minute they stepped off the boat. The father looked like he had typhus or something."

The Charzewskis—or "Chesleys," as they now feel compelled to call themselves—are just happy that the experience is over.

"I only wish that I had paid for better tickets," Aleksy says, scowling. "I don't know why the Ellis Island Ferry even has steerage compartments."

[tagged: genealogy, family tree, ancestry]

Da Vinci Code Sequel Causes Uproar

A Genealogue Exclusive [What's That?]

Dan Brown's much-anticipated follow-up to The Da Vinci Code will again feature Harvard professor Robert Langdon, this time trying to prove that 19th-century El Paso resident Jesus Delgado has descendants now living. This contradicts a Delgado family history published in 1956, which states that Jesus "died without issue."

Maria Delgado Montes, whose late father compiled the genealogy, is outraged that Brown would cast doubt on the book's veracity.

"If you'll pardon the expression, this is the 'Bible' of Delgado genealogy," she says, holding up a well-worn copy. "Everybody thinks so ... except that godless heathen at The American Genealogist who said it needed more footnotes. What gives Dan Brown the right to attack my father's book—especially the story of Jesus?"

Her outrage is shared throughout the El Paso area, where Jesus is something of a legend, remembered for his remarkable compassion. On one occasion, Jesus was climbing Mount Cristo Rey outside the city when he came upon a European immigrant giving birth. People still talk about his delivering the German on the Mount.

Brown alleges in his forthcoming book that Jesus secretly married a woman of doubtful reputation and produced a son whose descendants have controlled El Paso politics for generations. Shortly before his son's birth, Jesus was arrested for washing the feet of Jewish strangers against their will. He was executed soon after by a Texas governor eager to prove that he was tough on crime.

"He couldn't have married her," insists Maria—a great-great-grandniece of Jesus. "And if he did, it was only to redeem her reputation. And if he fathered a son, it was only to prove that she was worthy of carrying his child. Is there anything nobler?"

Despite this hypothesizing, Maria is confident that her father will be vindicated in the end.

"His research has been proven correct every time it's been challenged," she says. "Some say he was infallible, but that's going too far. After all, he did leave off a comma on page 327."

The World's Most Exclusive Hereditary Society

A Genealogue Exclusive [What's That?]

The Grand Dames of the American Colonies became the world's most exclusive hereditary society on Friday when its only two members, Lillian Walthrup and Gladys Drew, amended the organization's charter to exclude even themselves from membership.

"The amendment passed without objection," says Mrs. Drew, a retired librarian now living in Fort Myers, Florida. "As soon as we'd voted, we escorted each other from the room. Needless to say, tears were shed."

Expulsion from the Grand Dames was even more troubling for Mrs. Walthrup, a descendant of one of its original members, and chair of the refreshment committee.

The society was founded in 1856 in Philadelphia by the wives of Know-Nothing politicians. Frustrated that they could not campaign with their husbands to deport Catholics, the ladies began an organization that welcomed only the "right kind of people." The recent changes to the Grand Dames Charter were in keeping with the original philosophy of the group, says Mrs. Walthrup.

"We're not opposed to immigration, but illegal immigration is beyond the pale," she insists with an almost religious fervor. "To accept the descendants of undocumented immigrants into the society would be an insult to our ancestors. And it would reflect badly on the other members, of which there are now none."

The new rules required that members produce evidence that all of their American immigrant ancestors had come to this country legally. To their shame, neither Walthrup nor Drew could do so.

"Proving these things is very difficult," admits Mrs. Drew. "One of my great-great-grandfathers just showed up in New York out of the blue. Did he jump ship, or sneak across the border from Canada? Probably not, but I can't take the chance."

Mrs. Walthrup agrees. "We can't take the chance of sullying the society's reputation by admitting the descendants of criminals. If Gladys and I hadn't left quietly, I'm confident that we would have thrown us out. I'm just glad it didn't come to that."

[tagged: genealogy, family tree, ancestry]

ABC Greenlights Genealogy Sitcom

A Genealogue Exclusive [What's That?]

In a move meant to bolster its lackluster comedy lineup, ABC has greenlighted a sitcom starring veteran actor Abe Vigoda as a dedicated genealogist, and Cloris Leachman as his shrewish sister bent on keeping the family secrets secret.

In the pilot episode of Uprooted, Vigoda's character discovers that their great-great-grandmother was not a "Cherokee princess" as his sister hoped, but rather a German prostitute with unusually dark complexion. In an uncredited cameo role, Marie Osmond appears as a Family History Center volunteer who helps Vigoda rewind a reel of microfilm during the closing credits.

"This show can't miss," says executive producer Jay Barnett. "People love genealogy almost as much as they love Abe Vigoda. It can't miss!"

TV critic Mandy Crommett is not so sure.

"The genealogy angle has been tried before in sitcoms, and it's always fallen flat. Remember the time on Seinfeld when Jerry, Elaine, and George spent the whole episode waiting for a tour at Ellis Island? Or the time on Happy Days when Fonzie taught Chachi the importance of family history by jumping his motorcycle over Grandma Nussbaum's grave? Of course you don't. They were instantly forgotten."

Barnett thinks Uprooted will prove the critics wrong.

"The time is ripe for genealogy-based television. Once Uprooted takes off, we'll have a dozen other projects ready to roll. In fact, we have a comedy based on Alex Haley's Roots already in production. It was skewing 'urban,' so we recast the Kunta Kinte part," Barnett confides. "With Clay Aiken as the lead, there's no way it can miss!"

[tagged: genealogy, family tree, ancestry]