Levity in Brevity

St. Patrick's Day passed by without notice here at The Genealogue, so allow me to offer belatedly this story of the death of an Irish gentleman named (not surprisingly) Paddy.

His wife went to the newspaper to place his obituary. The newsman said the cost was $1 a word.

"I only have $2," Mrs. Paddy said. "Just print 'Paddy died.'"

The newsman decided that old Paddy deserved more. He gave her three extra words at no charge.

"A kind man you are," said Mrs. Paddy. "Print me husband's obituary this way: 'Paddy died. Boat for sale.'" [Link]

Their Irish Eyes Weren't Smiling

Sharon Shea Bossard has come to cherish her Irish ancestry and has even "acquired a slight brogue," despite the miserable St. Patrick's Days of her youth.

Her mother, Helen Shea, dutifully would fasten green satin ribbons to her four children’s school uniforms. That evening she would cook a traditional meal of potatoes and cabbage, pour herself a little whiskey and then play Irish melodies on the piano – alone.

Sharon’s father, Michael, headed straight for the local tavern from his job at a meat-packing plant and never showed up until late at night. He was distant and mysterious, his life locked behind pursed lips and vague references to the past.

“The only advice (my mother) ever gave me was: ‘Never marry an Irishman.’” [Link]

More Points to Ponder

• 34.5 million Americans can claim descent from an Irish ancestor.
• Very few Americans can claim descent from the Irish Elvis.

• 25,870 Americans speak Irish Gaelic at home.
• 248 Americans think they're speaking Irish Gaelic when really they're just drunk.
• 19 places in the U.S. are named "Dublin."
• Only one place in Ireland is named "Dublin," so we win.
  
• 93.3 million people planned to wear green last St. Patrick's Day.
• 37 million people unintentionally wore green last St. Patrick's Day.
• St. Patrick didn't really drive all the snakes out of Ireland.
• He gave them carfare.

Shaq Won't Play For the Celtics

An article in The Irish Echo examines the different ways black Americans have dealt with their positively Irish surnames and possibly Irish ancestries.

These days, some prominent African-Americans, including Detroit's mayor Kwame Kilpatrick, are keen to make a public proclamation of their Irish background. Kilpatrick is reported to once have wryly described himself as America's first "6-foot, 6-inch Irish African American" mayor.

Still, not all black celebrities are rushing to wrap themselves in Irishness. "I'm not Irish," basketball superstar Shaquille O'Neal informed the New York Times on St. Patrick's Day 2003. "I'm from the Brick City - Newark, New Jersey - and don't pinch me on the butt if I'm not wearing green." [Link]